TV Shows: Outland

This new Australian series has popped up. Upon my initial hearing of it, I turned my nose up. There is nothing at all appealing to me in the name Outland. It sounds like some shitty Outback Mcleod's Daughters crossed with some stupid Packed to the Rafters or something equally as horrid. Not a thing.

But, a trusty friend of mine alerted me to the fact that perhaps I should watch it whereupon I glanced the plot outline and decided it may actually be a larf. A cringey larf.

I evidently did not know what I was getting myself into. . .

It was half an hour of pure torturous hell! My stomach is still sore from the anxiety it's caused me. I basically contains all the things that I hate about film or television or even life in general.

The main being lies. Irrational lies!

Just as a run down. The series is about a group of sci-fi enthusiasts that meet up and being geeks. And they're all homos.

The first episode follows this guy, Max, who, having been on a date with some hot stud, Dylan, go back to his house. Max has all the nerves because his house is full of sci-fi paraphernalia and he has the nerd shame. So he makes all the excuses, goes up and cleans his house and they go to have the sexy times (interwoven with awkward side steps from the truth). Then the door bell rings and all of his sci-fi friends start to file into his house. He tries to get them out. The half hour is laden with cringes from the terrible transparent characters to the incredibly poor script but my main concern is with the main character Max's motives. Oh, he just tells so many fucking lies! Why is this convention so common!? (esp so in things like teen films and romantic comedies) For heavens sake, please tell the damn fucking truth! I know, I know, without it there would be no point of tension but here's the point: Create tension without the fucking lies! I wanna weep!

I won't get too wrapped up in this but I'll end with this last point. In the end, Max decides he doesn't want to continue seeing this Dylan character because he is falsely misinformed about something to do with Darlecks? (Don't look at me, I've never watched an episode of Doctor Who in it's entirety) and basically just perpetuates this stupid idea that people need to be within their own 'species' and never endeavour to challenge the limitations that are created that you buy into by choosing to be a certain 'thing'. My Fury Mounts!

Basically, this dumb series exists only to give me migraines and stomach flus, essentially glorifying the two biggest things I am against. I am also uncertain as to whether I'm going to take such a masochistic stand point and continue to watch it even though it causes me so much nauseating grief.

Here's a link to download

Tell me what you think.

Movies/Rant

Last night I watched 'Drachenzahmen', or as it is referred to in English, 'How to Train Your Dragon' (this is what happens when you favour counterfeit over the real deal). For those missing my regular formatting, here is a picture of the film's movie poster.

The story is pretty standard, complete with all your tropes and idioms: Misfit, Nordic boy (Hiccup), who is potentially bringing dishonour to the family discovers he is not like his kind, befriends most feared dragon of all the Nordics, cleverly gains respect of community by being adept at dragon subduing, makes intense discovery, shit gets real, father has new found pride for son, town changes for the better.

Now, here comes the beef!

There are countless childrens' stories that deal with this issue of the outsider, who is only an outsider due to lack of trying to understand what outsiders true nature is. Majority may be hostile and violent towards outsider because they had one bad experience with a certain person of their kind, or perhaps generations have passed down stories of certain outsider being 'an enemy' and no one has ever stepped up to question the authority except for Protagonist in current time of movie watching.

You see where I'm going with this?

It's pretty clear to me that these films can easily parallel the issue of bigotry in our regular lives. I am certain there are some jerks who will watch this film and feel moved by the plight of the dragons and how they were unfairly treated yet after the film ends decide to go egg a mosque because they hate Muslims.

If you can empathise with a character in a movie because they have been the victim of mistreatment why can you not look outward and apply that empathy to your life? Although that character in the movie is fictional there are plenty of "dragons" out there in the human world (oh, any minority you can think of) and the "Hiccups" in the world are the ones you're saying are "being too politically correct", or are "angry feminists" etc.

Look, perhaps I'm drawing this parallel to make sense with my way of thinking and some right wing, everything-phobe would parallel the movie in a way that favoured their belief system. Who am I to know. Alls i'm saying is that this seems pretty apt.

I'll give some credit here, and this could be my crack pot theory and do correct me if I'm wrong. If I think back to movies in general that were being fed into our all consuming mouths, they started to take a slightly more empathetic turn some time around the 80s and 90s. For this reason I think this is why our generation is a lot more aware of social injustices. It sounds naive but let's just clear the air, I'm not insinuating that movies are the sole purpose of any sort of radical social change. Obviously, greater access to the internet and all that jazz. Everything!

All I want to happen is that when people view a film to actually think about it. Especially children's films because that is the shit that's getting passed onto the next generation.

TV Shows: 2 Broke Girls, Glee, New Girl, Project Runway

If I am not cramming mountains of movies into my brain unnecessarily I'm keeping up to date with all the coolest of television shows.

Movies: Marathon

So, I went on this tiny hiatus because I was crushed, absolutely crushed that they shut down megaupload. Actually, I lie, I wasn't that crushed it just gives me more incentive to rage against the machine but it just means that all the links that I've shared on here are now rendered obsolete. Sucks, but this shall not pull me down into the depths of despair, no. As soon as I discover another reliable source I shall be bathing you with a golden shower of all things great.

I was formulating a whole post in my head spurred on by SOPA and PIPA but since them jerks have ceased the bill (for now) it seems kind of yesterday's news. Alas, my chance to rant about the idiocy of the whole thing will go unheard (apart from a small rant over coffee with a friend yesterday).

To keep the ball rolling and staying with the theme I will just go through what I've been watching recently movies-wise;

Trends: Lana Del Rey

So, My new teen crush Lana Del Rey hit the stage of Saturday Night Live

Clickity Click for the "Goods"

I am perplexed. I have never been so confused by a performer in my life. I LOVE IT!

She really is keeping up with the enigmatic bizarreity here. It's like watching a combination of an awkward 8th grade teen's first music night performance and a monologue wherein she poorly plays someone with a personality disorder where they clunkily switch from doe-eyed Dorothy Gale to sexy Russian temptress over and over again. Honestly, It has been a while since I have watched a live performance and have just not known anything. Just nothing. No words. Deathly awkward silence.

Here's the deal. I love this because we have come to believe that everything on the television, in the films is so perfect. Some effed up Utopia. If not perfect then tiresomely structured (news stories, for example, present gritty, hard-hitting happenings that are anything but harmonious) and it's refreshing to see something that has been broadcast to thousands of people that is perhaps unrehearsed, candid and, quite frankly, pretty shit.

And as the insecure bastards we are, we'll jump at any chance to tear apart someone else because we so despise ourselves and our imperfect lives that we have been measuring against unrealistic standards our whole lives - someone else's standards!

So, It's been boiling around the internets for a bit but people are starting to get more and more sceptical of Ms. Del Rey's abilities, preferring to run to 'he said she saids' and say "yeah, it makes sense". Specifically, Teh Haterz have been entertaining some rumours that she has been paid into the music industry because her daddy is rich therefore she's a 'puppet' in the music industry and apparently she has a producer who writes all the songs for her.

This is the thing, all of these insults are somewhat concerned with musical integrity. Integrity? I don't even believe that's a legitimate concept any more. Much less, if you're buying into this whole narcissistic internet social networking bullshit. As far as I'm concerned, We're attempting to sell ourselves to the world (and we're failing). We're all big narcissists and we all want the world to know (and think that they care for that matter) when our cat shits on our carpet or we win a blue ribbon at the little athletics 100 metres sprint. No one has integrity, unless you're like Gandhi or something. I'm not gonna lie, I just think that before you go and embarrass yourself by making some naive remark about someone being a 'puppet' of a particular industry you should consider; who has the handle of the wooden cross holding up your strings.

Trends: Put Your Hands Up

I'm not gonna lie, we're pretty drenched in party culture at the moment. If you think about the workplace where phrases like Hump Day and TGIF exist as a necessity to get workers through to the inevitable weekend of partying. After the weekend you've got your Mondayitis and your Eccy Tuesdays until inevitably you reach Hump Day (Wednesday) and before you know it you're Thanking God It's Friday again and so on and so forth. It seems that, as a whole, we like to go out, dance and drink away all the insecurities we carry around with us, all the while, a vicious cycle is created where all the anxieties are numbed by alcohol which continues to aggravate the anxieties until you're one big ball of nerves and you have a quarter/mid/identity crisis.

But let's not be a Debbie!

Most songs that obtain the fame these days will dabble into somewhat of this 'party culture' whether it be the use of the dance music genre, referencing or mentioning the word dance in your song or, if you are so audacious, just proclaiming your song to be the Party Rock Anthem. I think my favourite notion used in tunes to exemplify the party is for one to put one's hands up.

Now, when I think, "put your hands up", my mind instantly goes Mary J. Blige; her 2005 hit 'Be Without You'  where she boldy proclaims "Now, let me see you put your hands up!" Furthermore, 2006 saw the release of the aptly titled "Put Your Hands Up In The Air", which dropped a fat beat and quite simply (and repetitively) demanded that those metacarpi be at arms length away from your head. This body formation became a proclamation of patriotism where club go-ers were putting their hands up for Detroit (And as it were, some jerks started just taking the song and adding their fave city. For instance, L.A. & Copenhagen). If you're not into mindless patriotism and were wondering how can this club-like happenstance benefit you, look no further. If you are a pauper, like me, (or perhaps love a bit o'gold digging) and you were scoping the bar/club for someone to buy you a drink, you would be eternally grateful if this song came on! (Instantly you are able to recognise the gents with the $100 bills and, to a lesser degree, the $50 bills and your flirtations are thusly not wasted on penniless sitar players). If you were a slightly less superficial person scoping the clubs, or you had dropped a hectic ecstasy tablet and were wanting to find like minded individuals, you could be in luck if the DJ span the sweet tune of aussie fave Kylie Minogue, 'Put Your Hands Up (If You Feel Love)'.

Now, I can see you thinking, most of this happened between 2005 -2007 how is is relevant to me now? Wellity, please watch this video, which compiles the 25 best selling Billboard hits of 2010, and, if you are so short on attention, skip to about 3.40 for a compilation of the top pop artists beckoning you to assume that position that we've grown to be so fond of:

Simply googling "put your hands up" will open your mind to a whole new world of tracks which are also titled as such. It appears This Dude beat me to the punch with the listing of the tunes. So, why do we need to put our hands up!? Google can tell me of a thousand songs that want me to put my hands up but no search I can do will tell me why they want me to. I don't know about you but I really don't like to be told what to do. Perhaps it's because I'm so analytical but when someone tells me I have to do something that may make me look a fool I need to ask, why!? All I can think of is power. You extend your arms up toward the sky and you're vulnerable to tickles on the armpits or even stabs in the heart.

You're like a Martin Luther King of the clubs if you can somehow compel an audience into a unified action! But rather than inspiring civil rights among your countrymen, you are inspiring the buying of more drinks, the taking of more drugs and the nasty BJs in the dirty bathroom cubicle.

They've got us under control. Tell me, friends, the next time you're dancing your ass off on the dancefloor or in your bedroom in your underwear and the almighty Ke$ha implores that those hands ascend northward will you be so hasty as to follow suit or will you perhaps take a moment to think, should I really? how will this benefit me? or what will this say about my personality?

Documentary: Freakonomics

To be entirely honest, I had almost forgot that I watched this documentary which tends to suggest that it wasn't all it's cracked up to be. In my/its defence, I do often have stints of 3 movie marathons some nights and it's hard to keep up with what I watch. I had a sleepover with a couple of friends the other night and somehow I brought up a fact that I had seen in this film and promised I would share it here so they could obtain.

Freakonomics (2010)

We all love a good documentary because they're almost always on some interest topic and I find, generally, evoke more emotion from me than any sort of fictitious film that exists. What captured my attention with this particular documentary that it comes from an economic stand point which for me is something I have never considered or paid much attention to. It was a book (written by Steven Levitt & Stephen Gubner) prior to being a movie and I suppose if you want some thorough exploration of the concepts rather than a fabricated image-based information session by all means, read the book. The other positive about the production is that, for all us with the fluctuating attention spans, it's broken up into 'chapters' or 'short films' which were made by other famed doco-makers. This in turn means that, unlike your average documentary that makes a really good point but then gets all self-indulgent and tangental (am I the only one that thinks that?), this is just 4 short sharp films that make their point and call it a day. You wanna know what the actual content is before you waste 700mb downloading it? 1. they examine whether what you name your child will affect its life 2. sumos are corrupt (this one made me a little depressed) 3. some university sets a scheme to bribe kids into doing well at school 4. a theory that legalised abortion was a major factor in the dropping crime levels some two decades later. 

I found a sizeable article that debunks the abortion theory. Might be worth a read once you've watched. 

Have fun with this little documentary! http://www.megaupload.com/?d=1BLLNJYM